Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

Very interesting read (I apologize in advance for the typos). 20 Traits of Malignant Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Having been in a relationship with a partner that met 18.5 of the 20 traits listed here and knowing others that have escaped and are still escaping these relationships, I felt it was worth sharing. Also, please ignore the use of exclusively masculine pronouns--these can apply to women, as well.

When the PFA-ex and I attended counseling together (prior to me giving up and obtaining the PFA, of course), our therapist kept stating that he didn't believe __________ was actually bipolar, as he had been diagnosed in his past.  He never did state what he suspected the diagnosis to be, but I definitely have my suspicions... 

Yet Another Quote

"The truth was a mirror 

in the hands of God. 

It fell, and broke into pieces. 

Everybody took a piece of it, 

and they looked at it 

and thought they had the truth." 

~Rumi~

Thoughts

"It can be difficult to leave a long-term relationship, even when our inner-wisdom tells us it's time to let go.  At this point, we can choose to let go and endure the intense pain of leaving behind the familiar to make way for a new chapter in our life.  Or, we can stay and suffer a low-grade pain that slowly eats away at our heart and soul, like an emotional cancer, until we wake up one day and realize we are buried so deep in the dysfunction of the relationship that we scarcely remember who we were and what we wanted and needed to be.”  ~Jaeda DeWalt~

New Link

I am adding another site to the"Helpful Links" section.  I feel this is an important one having grown up in the environment; having had friends that were severely abused at the hands of their "law-enforcing partners" and due to feeling that most of the events on April 22, 2010 would not have transpired if my father did not wear a uniform.     Domestic Violence in Police Families

A Few Quotes by James Baldwin

I know I haven't been posting as much, lately.  I am still writing--most of it just hasn't made it into cyber space yet.  I am hoping soon to do some editing, finish some drafts and post a bit more over the next months.  For today, I wanted to celebrate the life of James Baldwin.  These are a few of his quotes that, in particular, reach out to me:

"One writes out of one thing only--one's own experience.  Everything depends on how relentlessly one forces from this experience the last drop, sweet or bitter, it can possibly give.  This is the only real concern of the artist, to recreate out of the disorder of life that order which is art." ~James Baldwin~

"Most of us, no matter what we say, are walking in the dark, whistling in the dark.  Nobody knows what is going to happen to him from one moment to the next, or how one will bear it.  This is irreducible.  And it's true of everybody.  Now, it is true that the nature of society is to create, among its citizens, an illusion of safety; but it is also absolutely true that the safety is always necessarily an illusion.  Artists are here to disturb the peace." ~James Baldwin~

"I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain." ~James Baldwin~

"Ask the wretched how they fare in the halls of justice, and then you will know, not whether or not the country is just, but whether or not it has any love for justice, or any concept of it." ~James Baldwin~

"All art is a kind of confession, more or less oblique. All artists, if they are to survive, are forced, at last, to tell the whole story, to vomit the anguish up."  ~James Baldwin~

 "Anyone who has ever struggled with poverty knows how extremely expensive it is to be poor."  ~James Baldwin~

"Art has to be a kind of confession. I don't mean a true confession in the sense of that dreary magazine.  The effort it seems to me, is: if you can examine and face your life, you can discover the terms with which you are connected to other lives, and they can discover them, too--the terms with which they are connected to other people."   ~James Baldwin~

"It is certain, in any case, that ignorance, allied with power, is the most ferocious enemy justice can have." ~James Baldwin~

Musings

Five years ago marked my last Thanksgiving with my family.  I had no idea then what would transpire over the next six months and how everything in my life would pivot upon the choices that I would make that day.  I had no idea that I would lose so many people that I loved, so many people that I trusted with my heart, so many people that I called family and friends.  All in a desperate attempt to remove one person from my life.  All in a desperate attempt to save myself.  All because I stood up and said no more.  All because I decided that my life still had value, when he insisted that it did not.  When I see all of the people that I have lost--within his family, within my own--would I, in hindsight, go back and change my decisions?  If I could have them all back, would it be worth the misery that I was living with daily?  Would I go back and change it???

Got Happiness?

An absolute must read, if you want the keys to happiness and success in life.  It's a quick read, but these seven factors determine your quality of life and whether it is going to be a fun ride or one filled with disappointment, frustration and discontentment.  Is it really this simple?  I believe it is...  

7 Habits of Chronically Unhappy People